A meeting has catered sandwiches and chips. Everyone is eating. What do you do?
The Short Answer
The meeting is about the meeting, not the food. You can skip the food entirely: it’s a meeting, not a meal. You can eat selectively if genuinely hungry: protein from a sandwich interior, skip the chips. Or you can eat minimally to participate socially without derailing yourself. What you shouldn’t do is eat mindlessly because food is present and others are eating. The social pressure to participate is real but manageable. One decision, then attention returns to the actual purpose of gathering.
Something to Sit With
How often does the presence of food override your actual hunger?
What would meetings look like if you stopped viewing the food as requiring a decision?
How much of your eating at work events is about hunger versus social performance?
Learn More
The Social Pressure.
Work catering creates social dynamics:
Conformity pull. Everyone’s eating. Not eating feels conspicuous.
Implied obligation. Someone ordered this food. Not eating might seem rude or wasteful.
Bonding ritual. Shared eating can create connection. Abstaining can feel like opting out.
Distraction and cover. Eating gives you something to do during awkward moments.
These pressures are real but not commands, and they work by modeling: in 64 of 69 experiments, with more than 5,800 participants, people matched their companions’ intake.[1] And attending to the meeting’s purpose is what you’re actually there for.
Option 1: Skip It Entirely.
You can simply not eat:
It’s not a meal, it’s a meeting. You weren’t invited to eat; you were invited to meet. Food is incidental.
Hunger can wait. For most healthy adults, a few hours without food is unremarkable. If you’re not hungry, there’s no reason to eat.
Minimal explanation needed. “I’m good, thanks” covers it. You don’t need to justify or explain.
Stay focused. Eating while meeting divides attention. Skipping the food lets you engage fully.
This option works particularly well if you’re not hungry or if the food doesn’t align with how you want to eat.
Option 2: Eat Selectively.
If you’re hungry or want to participate:
Choose protein. On the usual account, the meat or cheese from a sandwich satisfies more, calorie for calorie, than the bread it came on.
Skip the fillers. Chips, cookies, brownies: these are catering additions, not necessary components.
One serving, decided in advance. Know what you’ll take before approaching the food. Take it, sit down, done.
Water over soda. Beverage choice is easy to control and can make a real difference.
Selective eating lets you participate socially while maintaining standards.
Option 3: Minimal Participation.
If social pressure feels significant:
Take something small. A single item creates the appearance of participation without significant consumption.
Eat slowly or not at all. Having food on your plate doesn’t mean eating it. You can hold a plate, take a few bites, and set it aside.
Move away from the food. Once you have something (or appear to), position yourself away from the spread. Proximity drives consumption: a moderate effect, on low-certainty evidence, with distance raising the rated effort of reaching.[2]
This option prioritizes social dynamics while minimizing actual intake.
The Decision Framework.
Before reacting to catering:
Am I actually hungry? If no, skip it. Food being present can prompt appetite, but that is not the same as hunger.
Does anything here align with how I eat? If yes, have that thing. If no, skip it.
What’s the meeting about? Return attention to the purpose. The food is not the point.
What would I do if no one was watching? Social pressure can distort choices. Check what you’d actually want.
Managing the Internal Negotiation.
When catering arrives, your brain may start negotiating:
“Just a few chips won’t matter.” “I didn’t get breakfast, so this balances out.” “Everyone else is eating.” “The food is already here. Someone should eat it.”
These thoughts feel like reasoning but are often justification. Notice them, then return to your actual decision. You already know what you want to do.
After the Meeting.
Whatever you decide, don’t dwell on it:
If you skipped: Good. Move on.
If you ate selectively: Good. Move on.
If you ate more than intended: Note it, move on. One catered meeting doesn’t define your eating.
The energy spent reviewing and regretting food choices is energy wasted. Decide, act, continue with your day.
Further reading:
- Hollands GJ et al., “Altering the availability or proximity of food, alcohol, and tobacco products to change their selection and consumption”[3] — Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews, 2019
- Herman CP et al., Social Influences on Eating[4] (2019) — On social facilitation of eating
- Marteau TM, Hollands GJ & Fletcher PC, “Changing human behavior to prevent disease: the importance of targeting automatic processes”[5] — Science, 2012
Written by AI, directed and approved by me. How this is made →